Side Effect: Loss of Shoes and .... Clothing

Here I am, about three and a half years into diagnosis and treatment.  I am almost ready to weed through my beloved shoe collection, donate and consign my beauties.  Aside from being mentally ready for this challenge, there is also the physical aspect of going through them, sorting, and getting them to their perspective new homes ..... From the threads I have seen online, I am not alone in this.  It will be a challenge and I know it.  I am posting this wonderful talk from Dr. Catherine Backman - Changing Shoes: Impact of Arthritis on Self Identity and Roles which was presented at ROAR2014, and covers the psychological aspect.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2dqRmTbOvk

New shoes are coming into my life, a glaring symbol of the change my body has undertaken, shoes that I NEVER wanted to wear ... finding shoes that work with my feet and with clothes that I wear to work, skirts, dresses, pants that may still fit but were hemmed to wear with my beauties that have heels .... finding shoes that I can afford, because believe it or not, the shoes that I don't even want, are REALLY EXPENSIVE!  This is a whole other topic since I have had to shuffle my work life to accommodate my fatigue/rest and have an unreliable income.

I'll take this opportunity to say to any shoe designers out there, if you want to make alot of money .... design shoes that are supportive, comfortable, cute and affordable ... the money will come to you by the truckload!  I love my Birkenstocks, but I'm not kidding myself, they don't suit every occasion.

One thing I am doing, is slowly but surely, sorting through my closet and parting with clothing. Some people with Rheumatoid Disease have the side effect of weight loss, some don't, I don't  and I'm pissed! ..... I'm not sure if it is the biologic I am on, or not, I know I am suppose to work out, I did at the pool in a deep water conditioning class, which I loved, pilates has always been my favorite, but I can't afford it ... Alot of us are in a catch 22 here, we HAVE to work to pay our bills, and depending on our treatment and disease activity are so fatigued, that doing so uses up all our spoons.  I must rest, I don't want to, I have to!  making sure I rest enough so I can work, nevermind enjoy any leisure activities, is paramount ... working out is on the back burner for now .... so, I am trying to go through my closet, through clothes that I like, that now don't fit me, and getting them to women on our Downtown Eastside and possibly Dress for Success.  This is a tough process, because I would like to think that I may fit into these clothes again, but I am telling myself, that is not now.  

It is yet another blow and another thing that this disease is taking from us.